Tooth or consequences

French Dentist: You will need to be careful with your diet for a few days, so steamed asparagus, poached fish or grilled chicken instead of red meat.
Me (painfully):ok.
FD: And as for the aperitif, no red wine, only white wine or champagne.
Me (wincing): Not applicable, to be honest. What about Coca-cola?
FD: No. And no coffee either. You can have the occasional tea, but only through a straw.
Me (thinks ruefully): You would never get a foody talking-to like this in the UK.