Raiders of the Lost Bra

(de-cluttering in garage)

Disapproving Parent: Ahem. What is THIS? (dangles black, Calvin Klein silk bra, COVERED in cobwebs, from one finger)
Me (nose buried in yellowed copy of the Radio Times from May 30th, 1968): Oh, fantastic! I have been wondering where that was.
DP: It was in one of the boxes marked 2005.

Keep taking the tablets

(In pyjamas, with headache threatening, I swallow a couple of paracetomol)

Travel Bunny (scathingly): Is that your HRT?

Trolley Dolly

Flight attendant (standing at the front of the cabin, wearing pink, oversized, heart-shaped, Elton John-style sunglasses with sequins): Ok, riff-raff. We have now begun our descent, so please put your tables back up, fasten your seatbelts and make sure your shoes match your outfit. We do have baby-change facilities on board, so make sure you are happy with your choice before disembarking. Oh, and anyone who wants scratchcards, catch me as I mince down the cabin. Ta-ra!"

Where is my umbrella?

...asks a poster in the metro advertising a school offering English tuition for professionals. Culturally specific, obviously.

Wonder what an equivalent poster on the Tube would say in French?

C'est a quelle heure, le dejeuner*, perhaps?




* What time is lunch?