Tuesday 13 October 2015

Meufs sans Oeufs*



(In car, after loading it with two small boys, school bags, sports kit and shopping)


Yummy Mummy (fiddling with keys in ignition): So it was only when he started drilling that I realised he was doing the wrong tooth!
Me (mouth open, shocked enough to stop applying lip gloss): You are joking! What did you do?
YM (still fiddling, distracted): Well, I tried to tell him but his arm was in my mouth up to the elbow, so I couldn't speak..
(Small squeak from back seat..Mummy, there's a man..)
Me (appalled, waving lip gloss in mid/air): Oh, my God. Nightmare. What happened?
YM (keys finally in ignition, starts car): So eventually I just grabbed his arm and pulled it away, that's when he realised..
Me (outraged): What are they like? They never pay attention to what they are doing, that's the problem over here..

(Passenger seat window):TAPTAPTAP.

French Man (grinning): Here you go, girls (hands over box of 12 eggs). You left these on the roof of the car. We thought we ought to let you know before you drove off (gestures behind himself at entire shop full of Frenchies watching, pointing and clutching their sides with laughter)





*Birds without Eggs