Cafe ou claque?

In kitchen...

 Me (bleating): ..and it was REALLY raining by now, cats and dogs, and then, the bus driver asked me how I got on the bus, even though I had just walked past him, and then a drunk got on the bus, and THEN the bus stopped and the driver said it was the terminus and I had to get off and cross the road and wait for another one, and THEN...

Suave Frenchy (interrupting, having listened to enough): Do you want coffee or a smack?

Beanz Meanz Peaz

Laney: Yeah, its called "The Voice", and Tom Jones is on it and some guy, I dunno, Will-I-Am from the Black-Eyed Beans?
Me: PEAS. They're the Black-eyed PEAS.

Toilet training

Day Three of living in the clutches of an unreconstructed latin MACHO:

(In bathroom, just finishing up, I glance down at toilet lid and think to myself:) hhmmmmm...time for a small, individual act of defiance, perhaps?

I slip out, leaving the seat firmly DOWN.

Coming over all Cuire

French banker: I have been thinking. What about Cuire? That's a nice neighbourhood as well, and not too far out.
Me: Queer? No!

Carpeted at the UN

(Leaving council chamber)
Swiss Dave: Honestly, what were they thinking putting carpet down here? With all the footfall coming through? Tiles would have been much more practical.

Sardine modesty

Me (joking via email): How will I recognise you? It's been a while.
Sardine (via email reply):I'll be the gorgeous guy in top shape standing with a unresistable smile in the middle of the square... ;)

See ya at 16h30!